


Lost Magic

by Lhaewiel



Category: Original Work
Genre: Adventure, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fantasy, Gen, I poured my soul in this, Magic, Sarcasm, Swords & Sorcery, The Author Regrets Nothing, feedback more than welcome, general tale
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-30
Updated: 2020-02-16
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:42:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22037977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lhaewiel/pseuds/Lhaewiel
Summary: Where a witch realises that she has lost her magic and to find out why she embarks in a long journey to rediscover herself.





	1. Prologue - The beginning

**Author's Note:**

> And hello! Long time no see! This was originally my NaNoWriMo 2019, I had started as a way to get back on my feet both in writing and in real life. This then developed in a more ambitious project. I am pretty proud of what is coming out. I am also posting my work here, where you will find more information as well: 
> 
> https://lostmagicbylhaewiel.tumblr.com/
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

**Where a witch realises that she has lost her magic and to find out why she embarks in a long journey to rediscover herself.** ****

_Third Era, Month of the Wolf 2024, Day 11_

The High Tower was an imposing figure, ominous some people would say. Mages and soldiers alike were warding it and the whole place was saturated with seals and heavy iron doors. The young woman gazed at the place with a gloomy expression, sighing softly, as if preparing herself for the worst.

Her red robes were flowing lightly in the cold wind. She shivered. She had only heard in tales and chronicles of this place and even when the Grand Coven of Estria mentioned it;, she could not really wrap her head around the idea.  
The tower, a grim, tall building that had been built there after the Treaty of Ironmouth, during the First Era of that continent, had been a monument of what Mages should never be and eventually became the location for the imprisonment for those who were caught straying.

Thus, the whole area reeked of dark magic and made the woman so sick that for a moment she felt like passing out.  
She felt a hand on her shoulder. A man with dark hair and brown eyes wearing a silver-plated armour held her,“You can do it, Tiriana.” She briefly looked at him, then responded. “Thank you, Thiseias.”  
“Do you want me to come?”  
“No, but thank you for the offer.” She frowned. “This is something I have to do myself.”  
He nodded. “I will be waiting in the guards’ station.”

She let out a soft sigh, then nodded. As they approached the building, one of the guards came forward. “This place is forbidden to common folks. Please state your names and reason.” The guard announced, standing still in front of the two. Tiriana spoke,“My name is Lady Tiriana Blackstar, I am here to visit a prisoner.”  
“I am Thiseias Valiadis, General Commander of Thastus. I am here as escort to Lady Blackstar.”  
The guard arched a brow. Tiriana spoke again. “You should have received a letter from the High Council of Thastus and the Grand Coven of Estria.”

It was in that moment that the Captain of the post came forth, having heard the conversation. “We were waiting for you. Please come.”

No further questions were asked. As stated, Thiseias remained with the Captain, while Tiriana was escorted through the corridors of the tower.

The tower was lined internally by an interminable flight of stairs, interrupted only by a few floors, where the guards were allowed to rest in between shifts. The cells were lined along the stairs, the lower floors keeping the lesser rogues, the higher ones holding the worst ones.

Tiriana was being conducted upstairs, where the most heinous criminals were held. The distance seemed infinite, and the woman felt something heavy grow inside her at every step. By the time they stopped, she could barely breathe. The guard turned towards her, “I will be outside if you need me. She has restraining seals, if you are worried. Knock when you are finished.”

Tiriana nodded, then took a breath of air to brace herself ( breathed in some air). The door opened and closed behind her - she could barely contain the rush of panic coming with that claustrophobic space. After a brief moment, she managed to regain her composure. She focused her attention on the figure sitting by the small, barred window.  
“Grandmother.”

She called her while holding herself, arms crossed around her waist. The figure slowly turned. “Tiriana. You finally visited.”  
The younger woman nodded,“Yes.”  
“Such an ungrateful granddaughter you are. Just like everyone else.”  
Tiriana felt a pang in her heart. As much as she hated the woman in front of her, as much as she felt happy that justice had been done, she could not help but feel the pain. She felt, among all her negative feelings, gratefulness and sadness as well.

She wanted to say something, but stopped herself. This was not the time to argue, especially if she wanted to know. She closed her eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose. She decided to ignore everything her grandmother had said.  
“Grandmother. You know we have to talk.”  
“No, we don’t. Why do you want your grandmother to suffer? I have raised you with all my love!”  
Tiriana sat near her on the bed that had been placed for her grandmother. This was proving more difficult than expected.  
“We both need closure and you know that. You also know what you did. If any lucidity is left in you, can you please tell me why you stole away my magic?”

Straight to the point. Agnes Blackstar, once a renowned Mage, was rotting away in a dark cell, in one of the most awful quarters of the continent. Tiriana was feeling the urge to end the conversation as quickly as possible, before the darkness would seep into her bones. The old woman snapped.  
“Why should I? I thought you knew.”  
Tiriana sighed, then responded in a soft tone. “I know that underneath that there is a decent human being with actual feelings. I know, otherwise Mum and Dad would have never put up with you in the way that they did. We need closure, both of us.”  
“What good would it do to me?”  
“It might get you to a more comfortable place.”  
The elderly woman considered the option, staying silent for a long time and fixing her eyes on her granddaughter.  
“I don’t believe you. You will not forgive me.”  
“True, grandmother. I will not. I have suffered, Mum and Dad suffered. I will not forgive you. But knowing will definitely unburden us both, so that we are able to move on.”  
She paused,“One day, when I will be wiser, I will try and rethink this, but I will want to do this with nothing clouding my judgement.”  
Her grandmother sighed, feeling a mix of frustration, sadness and concern.  
“You may not want to know.”  
“That is for me to decide.”  
The elderly woman breathed in some of the stale air, then nodded,“Be prepared then.”  
“I will be, grandmother.”

She adjusted herself on the bed, waiting for the other to start. Several minutes passed by in silence, then finally the old woman spoke.  
“I wanted this to be in a different situation, but this will have to do. There is no profound reason behind my actions.”  
“I wanted to be loved and accepted by you, grandmother. As I was, not as everyone expected me to be.”  
“My dear, I could not bring myself to do that. I can’t. You are not a perfect specimen of Mage.”  
“A specimen? Is that all I am to you?”  
“That is all I was for my father, unlike my brothers and sisters. I was the prettiest, most talented of them all. That’s why they threw rocks at me,shackled me so I could rise from the ashes anew. You were too, but no one was making it hard enough and your talent was wasted. Now you are easily the most powerful of them all, you should thank me.”  
Tiriana stayed in a shocked silence for a long time. Was that really the reason why? Was there something else? She stuttered before actually forming a coherent thought.  
“Are A-are you being serious?”

Her grandmother was not joking, “I did not need that, I did not want that! I was happy. I was fine. I was safe.”  
“You were still a child, now you are a woman.”  
“I had already grown up enough when mother died. Why did you make everyone suffer?”  
“To show them what you were made of.”  
Tiriana had to stand up and pace to calm down the rage, a stark contrast with Agnes’ calm behaviour.  
“Oh, by the Gods. Was this another way to forge me into what you were expecting?”  
“Yes, and I see that I failed.”  
Tiriana felt her rage surge, walking around was not really helping. She made the extreme effort to stay quiet, a ruckus in that place was the last thing she wanted. She also felt the suffocating tendrils of looming dark magic around her ,affecting her more than she wanted to admit. She exhaled a couple of breaths, then sat back down on the bed.  
“Grandmother, I have understood.” She replied in a calm, but harsh tone.  
“Will you come again?”  
“I don’t know. I will be back once I have become wiser.”  
“I always did everything because I love you.”  
Those words hurt more than a sword. The old woman was looking at her, “Do you not love me?”  
Tiriana closed her eyes. “I will answer, but not now.”  
“Have you had your closure?”  
“We will see in the long run.”  
“I understand.”

Tiriana knocked at the door of the cell, letting the guard know that she was done. She glanced back briefly to see her grandmother weeping - oh, was she feeling sadness, pity, while looking at the elder woman? She sent away the thought, holding it for another day.  
The guard let her out, then closed the door of the cell. “Please let her be comfortable. She may have given me hell, but she is also old.” She told the guard, who nodded in slight bewilderment.  
While she was going back down, she kept thinking of what had happened.

***

_Third Era, Month of the Rabbit 2019, Day 14_

Tiriana had put up a very brave face, when she left the Blackstar estate. Her father was proud, the rest of her family was left rioting among each other.

She had taken off with the first caravan to discover new possibilities- and to find what she lost again, but the great big world so far had been nothing like the books she had so avidly read about Meukoras.

There were not as many Mages as she had hoped and the enchanted places were mostly forbidden to the average adventurer.  
Now, not even three weeks after her departure, there she lay, in that stinky alley, rethinking her life choices- and still no magic in sight. She had arrived in the mighty city of Durinamurum, in the Kingdom of Frenia, but nothing about this place felt magical or enchanting enough. She had felt that lingering sensation of loss and loneliness, as if she had just lost someone, or something. She felt powerless and homesick.  
The few supposed Mages that she had met with revealed to be just those regular swindlers her parents had always told her to keep away from. She barely got out by inventing some pathetic excuse, but this had done nothing but depress her further.

It had been such a sudden change that she had barely had time to register what was happening. She had gone through most of the stages of grief. She had felt paralysed, she had tried to deny it, she had vented out to everyone in sight her frustration and she had pushed away everyone and now…

Now she was stuck and delivering the news to her father had not been easy. Her family, being one of the big names, had always had really high expectations for her and suddenly delivering to them the fact that she had lost her magic, on top of the fact that she was now living in the slums- well, it felt to their eyes as if she had betrayed them all.  
Her father was the exception to the rule and even though he felt dismayed, he never stopped supporting her.  
And she had felt guilty- no, they made her feel guilty, but she could not get out of her head the thought that it was all her fault.

She had spoken to her father, a good-tempered man who was struggling himself with the stigma and prejudice of his deceased wife’s family, and told him that she would not stop until she managed to find her magic again.  
Her dad had decided that he would support her decision, after all his daughter moping around the house without having anything to do had been a sight he never expected to see, so maybe this was what she needed to go back to how she was before. He helped her prepare her bags, gave her the money she had put aside for herself, provided her with food and a map, then brought her to the main road, where a caravan was ready to leave.  
Only at that point he allowed himself to break. He hugged her tightly, then spoke. “Tiriana, please, be careful on the road. And if everything goes downhill you come back, no matter what.”  
She smiled, “Thank you, Dad. I promise.”  
“Do you have everything with you?”  
“Yes.”  
“Write back whenever you can.”  
“I will. I’ll take care. You take care too.”  
“You know you don’t need to worry about your old man.”  
They said a few more words, then she went to the caravan. The last thing she noticed, before leaving everything behind, was her dad, trying to follow where the caravan was going.  
Tiriana had sighed thoughtfully, ready for what would come next for her.

***

The caravan, after some days, finally arrived in the great city of Durinamurum. Tiriana had told herself that starting from a big city would be the most judicious plan . There were new things to do, new people to meet and if she wanted to get her magic back then it would have been much easier to go around and ask.

She had managed to find a room at a local inn towards the outskirts of the city called “The Flying Fox”- she had sneered at the name and though it was not that great, she did not have any money to spare.

She stepped into the inn after mustering up all the bravery she could. She walked past a group of people, who glanced curiously at her, then followed her as she went to the counter. She waited patiently for the owner to arrive, a robust man with a bald spot on his head, then spoke.  
“Hello, I’d like to see if you have a room available.”  
“Yeah, sure,” he replied, “how many?”  
“Just me.”  
He briefly glanced at her, the look that would say, you know, you look lost, but nothing other than a quick nod came as a response. The innkeeper took a book out from under the counter, then asked Tiriana to pay up and sign the guest book, making sure she noted down how long she would stay- if she didn’t have a place she would have to pay the fee every two weeks. She nodded, filed the book, then the innkeeper gave her the key.

She went to the room, shutting the door behind her.

At this point she sat on the bed and looked around. The room itself was plain, there was a window with some horribly patterned curtains, a small desk with a chair, a cupboard and a bed with a thin mattress and an even thinner blanket. She sighed, maybe with time things would get better. She put her things in the closet, then changed and went to sleep. Tomorrow would be better, she said to herself.


	2. Chapter 1 - The good side of luck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where, in spite of all unlucky events, she makes a very lucky encounter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual, all info here:  
> https://lostmagicbylhaewiel.tumblr.com/
> 
> I have already some chapters fully written, which I am trying to revise. I hope you enjoy!

_“Practice once more, Tiriana”  
The girl looks at her mum with a frown. “I don’t want to. I wanna play.”  
“You will play after. Now, do the exercise.”  
Tiriana lets out a huff and focuses again on the heavy book displayed in front of her. Amethyst, her mother, looks at her patiently, while she explains the exercise once more.  
“Every spell starts with a circle. First you need to draw a circle…”  
Tiriana listens to her, she glances at the textbook, trying to make sense of the explanation. All she wants to do is go and play outside, but for some reason she is not allowed._

_Amethyst lets out a soft sigh. “Tiriana, are you paying attention?”  
“But mum, I wanna play!”  
“Not until you get this.”  
In that moment Sol, her dad, passes by. “Darling, why don’t you let Tiriana play? Has it been not enough?”  
Amethyst shakes her head, then points her index outside._

_Agnes is talking to her sisters, who have come to visit. Sol nods, understanding. The woman speaks, holding her daughter’s hand.  
“If I let her out now, my mother is going to ask Tiriana to show off and regardless of the result she is going to mock her. And you know what happened last time, I am still trying to coax out of my child a tiny bit of confidence.”  
Sol nods gravely. Agnes, his mother-in-law, always thinks she is the best out there and no one has tried changing her mind so far. He knows that she will chew on Tiriana, just like she is doing with him and his wife, difference being that they can be strong enough, Tiriana is a child, their child._

_Maybe they are being overprotective, but they do not want to see their daughter cry. Ever._

_Tiriana does not really understand what is going on. She is fiddling with the quill, when she sees her father kneeling down beside her. “Hey, how about you listen to mum, then we all go out and go to the park, so you can play as much as you want?”  
Amethyst smiles. “When we come back I am making pastries.”  
Tiriana gives her parents a big smile, the nods. “Okay!” She then concentrates on the exercise._

_***_

The noise of the busy street woke up Tiriana from her trance and she cursed for the seventh time in ten minutes all her bad choices. In the span of several weeks she had completely forsaken her family, her belongings - except the few tokens she took with her when she left - so that she could have a chance, but so far everything had gone wrong.

She had quickly discovered the hard way that noble families were not so welcome among the populace, so flaunting her family name at the beginning was not really a smart move, hence she decided to take a different surname. She was now Tiriana Firebell, a common apothecarian looking for some quietness.

She had also learned that whilst most of the people would speak the common language, she needed to learn the language of the nation she was in - and according to her map she was now in the city of Durinamurum and she could pass as a radom tourist only for a short time.

Also, she would have, sooner or later, to find an actual house instead of living in the room of the inn she was staying at, The Handy Steed - she had to change due to a foreseeable change in her finances. That inn itself deserved its own place in whatever firey hell the Goddess of Death had created to host the souls of the evildoers.

It was a huge plain building with tasteless furniture, bad organisation of spaces and even worse scenery. The east side was on a barely lit street with a small, dark and unkept park on the other side where every crawling creature or human or goblin would find a good place to nest in. The west side sat on the Great Cemetery of Dark Willow, the biggest in the whole Frenia, hosting the tombs of great warriors and Kings and Queens, possibly haunted and with a full tour sponsored by the local mortician at the reasonable price of three siver coins.

She sulked further, trying not to think about it. At least there were no bugs or mice and she was not forced to share her room with anyone, given that she had to be the one responsible to keep the room clean and locked. She was regretting leaving her large room, her soft bedsheets and pillows, then remembered what exactly she had left behind.

She remembered leaving a family that was full of controlling and abusive people, who entered into relationships just to forge allegiancies and have their partners be just trophies. Her mum and dad represented the exception, but that did not shield them from the rest of the Blackstars.

According to the last letter from her dad Sol, he had now been kicked out of the family and had gone back to live with his brother and brother-in-law - that had made Tiriana almost go back home, but Sol had insisted that she should stay where she was, free and more focused, he would deal with the rest.

She sighed once again, then felt her stomach growling. She hadn’t been eating properly for a while and had lost weight. This was not really surprising, considering that she had been living off whatever did not require cooking and that was not a lot - bread, fruits, sometimes pastries and not much more. It felt like ages since last time she had had a proper meal.

Tiriana got up and went out of her room to see what was the offer. She stepped into the so-called dining hall, a cramped up room with a counter, two couches and a total of six tables and unmatched chairs all around. The lady at the counter was placing a few pastries, some loaves of bread and miscellaneous fruits and nuts looking less appetising each day. Whilst she was eyeing the goods, she heard a voice from behind.  
“Are you actually gonna eat one of these things?”  
She raised a brow, scowling a bit, as if to say that she was ready to fight.

What she saw utterly surprised her. There was an averagely tall man in a ranger garb in front of her, with dark hair and brown eyes. She felt like there was a fight or flight response to give and she also felt like there should have been instructions somewhere, but no sign was on sight.  
“Yes, and? Who are you?” Her tone was less polite than expected, Tiriana guessed it was the fact that she felt horribly.  
“You’re going to be sick. I am Thiseias. Mercenary, ranger.”  
The word “mercenary” triggered her flight response. She probably had picked up the wrong fight. Everyone had constantly told her to stay out of a mercenary’s range of vision, and now she understood why.

She tried to apologise and find a way to get out, but Thiseias stopped her.  
“I can offer meat. I am not going to eat you.” Tiriana raised again her eyebrow, then took in a deep breath. How much was she willing to risk for the chance of one good meal?

She looked at the man once more - although he had declared to be a mercenary there was something that told her otherwise. She felt curious and against her better judgement she asked: “Why would you help me?”  
He laughed softly. “I saw you cry earlier on. First time on the road?”  
She could not pinpoint his intentions. What was he going to do then? She squinted her eyes, not really believing that there was someone willing to help her in a completely genuine fling of generosity. “… Are you pitying me?”  
She sounded doubtful and the ranger picked that.  
“Sometimes you need help. We are all on the same boat here. We all don’t know what to do. That is however your call. I will not bother you if you say no.”

She looked down nervously. Was he actually letting her decide what to do next? She looked at him once more and he did not look like he was intending any harm. She was however hungry and her mood had not been great for quite some time. In all honesty that was the first time ever someone had offered her some sort of help and she was struggling on how to deal with that. She had always been taught that the world outside was a bad place and she had only herself to rely on - hence she never really had any significant bond outside the one with her parents.

She was not sure on how to act towards this act of friendliness. She looked at Thiseias, still quite confused. The man grinned, then offered her his arm. “If you decide to come with me, we’re just here.” He went back and sat among other men in ranger robes. She decided to trust her guts. At a certain point she would have to trust someone, after all she was alone in that place. She prayed that she had made the right decision when she approched the group.  
“May I sit here?” She asked Thiseias. He smiled, then nodded, saying to the rest of the group:  
“Hey, move, we have a lady. Show manners you fuckers”  
She couldn’t help but chuckle.

She sat next to Thiseias, on the other side there was a lanky man with a beard. He promptly laughed, then replied: “Hey, about time you brought your girlfriend!”  
“Shut up, Inara, or you want me to chop off your jewels? Anyway…”  
He put a plate full of stew in Tiriana’s hands.  
“There you go. You will need energy.”

Tiriana looked more confused than ever, but she accepted the bowl of stew. He promptly introduced her all the members of the group. Everyone was from several fighting classes. There was a fighter, a couple of archers and former rogues, Inara was one of the latter. Then everyone found an excuse to leave, until there were only Thiseias and Tiriana. At this point he added:  
“We all kind of saw you crying. We have all been there. Why didn’t you ask for help?”  
Tiriana felt a tear at the corner of her eye. “I don’t know anyone. I am…”  
“Scared?”  
She nodded slowly. He put more stew in her bowl, then poured a cup of water he had fetched from the counter and placed it on the table in front of her.  
“First time on the road?”  
“First time ever. I miss my dad. I can’t do anything.”  
“Yeah, I understand. It’s going to get better.”  
“What do I do?”  
“That is really your call only. All I can offer is a shoulder to cry on if you need it.”  
She breathed in. “Are you really a mercenary?”  
“No, but given my skills and my lack of money it’s the only option at this time. Also, the others look sketchy, but they are also good guys.”  
“I see.”  
She felt tears rolling down her cheeks, then a warm hand wiping them away. Thiseias spoke. “You need to eat and rest.”  
She nodded, then started eating in silence.

When she had finished Thiseias talked first. “So, how was the stew…”  
“Tiriana. My name is Tiriana Firebell. The stew was nice.” Her voice was still a bit shaky, but she felt better. In the meantime the rest of the group came back, sitting by the two. Thiseias looked at them in the ‘do not joke about anything right now’ look. The others nodded.  
“Judging by your accent you must be from Estria.” Said one of the archers, a black skinned young man with brown eyes called Yaro.  
“Yes.” She sighed.  
“How did you find yourself in this rat hole? I mean. You must have some friends or family here, right?”

Tiriana lowered her head, trying to find the words. She bit her lips, started fidgeting. She felt her head light and her breath becoming heavier. Her chest started hurting, but she tried her best to keep calm. A fit was the last thing she wanted anyone to see.  
“It’s complicated. I’m alone here. All my family is in Estria.”  
Thiseias shook his head. “Further reason to ask for help, silly head.”  
“I know. Now I know.”

She had never really had anyone to rely on. She had been lonely, and betrayed by the people she had deemed friends in the past, so she had been relying on herself only for so many years that she had forgotten how to ask for help when she needed it. She stuttered a bit.  
“I… I don’t know… I don’t know anyone…”  
“Now you know us, right? You can ask for help.” Said Thiseias

Tiriana was speechless for a very long moment, then she hid her face in her hands.  
“Hey, you cunt, you made your girlfriend cry, Thiseias!” She faintly heard one of the men say jokingly. She also heard several insults, then Yaro saying: “We’ll leave you two alone. Say sorry properly!”

And then it was just her with Thiseias. He put a hand on her back. “Hey, don’t listen to these sons of bitches, ok?”  
Tiriana wiped off her tears, then nodded. “You all are quite different from what you look like.”  
“I know. You’re gonna hang out with us at lunch again, right?”  
“Probably.”  
“I’ll come to look for you tomorrow. It’s hard being on the road and it’s hard seeing who to trust or not.”  
“And can I trust you?”  
“I don’t know. That’s for you to decide. In the meantime we’ll see you tomorrow.”  
He then stood up and left.

Tiriana went back to her room with her head full of thoughts and finally a full stomach.


	3. Chapter 2 - Wandering

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The innkeeper is kicking out his guests! Tiriana finds herself a new purpose and a new house, while a big secret is out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And chapter 2 is out! As usual feel free to drop me a message :)
> 
> More info at https://lostmagicbylhaewiel.tumblr.com/

**The innkeeper is kicking out his guests! Tiriana finds herself a new purpose and a new house, while a big secret is out.**

_Dear Tiriana,_

_I hope that you are alright and that this letter reaches you safely._

_After you left things got a little bit hectic. You know how much diplomatic I am, so I discussed a few things with your grandmother. Sure, I got to say everything I had in my chest and I do feel relieved on that side._

_On the other side, I was kindly invited to pack all memories and belongings and find a new house. Lenore, you know, my companion, helped me after I stayed some time with your uncle Orion._

_It wasn’t easy, but we made it. I am curremtly at Lenore’s house, helping her tend to her mother._

_I hope you have a roof above your head as well. Remember, dad is always with you and if you need anything don’t hesitate to ask me._

_I will do what I can to help you._

_Please take care of yourself and keep your chin up._

_Love you.  
Father_

_***_

_Hello Father_

_The letter reached me safely, I hope this one does as well._

_What can I say? I am disappointed, but not surprised at gradmother’s reaction. She never really had any kind words to spare, she always put us through hell and for better or worse I am glad that you are out._

_I have had some rough times, but I am surviving. I have met up with a bunch of weird people. They look scary, but they are nice. They are Nonvoyants, I think they might be able to help me deal with this whole situation._

_I still haven’t found my magic. I don’t feel it, I am getting worried that I will be like this my whole life._

_I can still make healing potions and salves, so I could potentially open an apothecary and live off that. It could be a start. I am going to see some places around Durinamurum, hopefully I can find something._

_Love.  
Tiriana_

***

Tiriana closed the letter with a sigh. She had figured that the situation would degenerate after she left and that the only thing keeping her dad Sol in a relatively safe place was her presence. Or that could also not be the case, her grandmother, Agnes Blackstar, retired Head of the Grand Coven of the Kingdom of Estria, had a mind no one could decipher, so that could be one of her grand schemes.

Again, that was something that apparently ran in the family and once again she maybe had made a good decision in changing her surname in something a little more common and less ‘hey, shoot an arrow here’ kind of. She also wanted to keep her own mind safe and that was important if she wanted to have a chance to find her migic again.

She heard a knock on the door, that made her snap out of her thoughts. She frowned lightly, then answered with a soft “I’m coming”. Once she reached the door, she slowly opened it. Thiseias was there in front of her. “Hey, you ready to see some places?”

She smiled and nodded.

After that first meeting, she had found herself a little bit more at ease. She had been able to make friends with a few people. The lady next door, Sinta, a determined woman from Sinkosia, upon learning that Tiriana was completely on her own, had become somewhat protective, her maternal intincts kicking in.

Sinta was making sure that Tiriana was sleeping and eating properly. There was also an elderly lady from Luolanmenmar, she barely spoke any lingua franca, but she tried to teach Tiriana a few words in Ñïrgaarish. There was also a scholar, a young woman called Lieve, who tended to go out really early, then come back after midnight.

And then there was Thiseias, the ranger.

The whole place had decided,for some weird reason, that they were a couple. The two were bickering, eating together, doing laundry together, hanging out together, but they were actually not a couple - it was just cheaper on the money doing like that.

They both had different views and priorities, hence the only thing there was a friendship and it frustrated them both when everyone referred to them as a couple.

Tiriana was laughing off the tease all the time, but the only man allowed to ever enter her room for Sinta was Thiseias, all the others would be warded off. The interests that had tied the two into this sort of friendship was that he knew how to cook and she knew how to heal - hence the idea of opening a true apothecary sprung out.

She considered this as a temporary measure, while she sorted out herself and it allowed her to actually have something to pay off her expenses.

Sinta immediately encouraged her, sending her off with Thiseias.

The two were now on the road, waiting for a couple of friends to arrive. The two of them did not make them wait, arriving nearly immediately. Tiriana was curious, as she had only heard talking about them. The two formed a nice coouple: the woman called Alja had elf-like traits, long black hair and big blue eyes, while the man called Azar was a little buff with brown eyes and short messy dark hair. They were also looking for a house.

After a quick introduction, Alja asked: “Why are you two looking for a house? Isn’t it a little more comfortable staying at the inn?”  
Tiriana sighed. “The innkeeper has not kept track of how many rooms there were still available, therefore kept signing down bookings. Now all us permaent guests are kind of being thrown out, so…” She made a pause. “Also, it is about time we found a proper place.”  
Alja laughed lightly. “By the tone of your voice you sound like those richy rich snobs in the nice quarters.”  
Tiriana did not reply, just scrolled her shoulders and changed subject. “So, we are all here, shall we go?”

They all nodded, then went to meet up with the vendor, a tall guy with pale blonde hair and icy eyes. He greeted everyone politely, the proceeded to show off what he had.

They were mostly, if not all of them, houses with not much room and too many people living inside. Some of them had windows that could not be opened ad others had leaks all around. Tiriana was getting more and more disgusted, but everyone else was on the it-could-be-worse tones - she guessed that this was just her being used to live differently, so she mostly kept everything for herself.

And at the end of the tour, way into the afternoon, Thiseias found a place that was perfect, but only for two people. It looked like a small hut had been fitted among the other houses. The house was on two floors and consisted of a bigger room on the ground floor, then a flight of stair would take them all to the upper floor, which consisted of three rooms in different size. The first one was big enough to fit a kitchen and a table, maybe a small couch. The other looked like it would be a good bedroom. The third was just a utility room. Thiseias looked at Tiriana, who was trying to fit her view.

Azar and Alja, on the other side, were shaking their heads. This was really not the house they were looking for - Azar and Alja were both cooks, so they really needed a space large enough for a tavern, but this one… Tiriana looked at Thiseias, who grinned.  
“That’s for us.” he declared to the vendor. “Tiriana and I are going to take this. How much?”  
“Wait a second.” Tiriana chimed in. “Do we have a contract? If yes we want a copy of it and everyone needs to sign off. If we do not have a cotract, then the deal is off.”  
Everyone looked at her in utter confusion. The first to say something was Azar.  
“Why do you need a contract?”  
She looked at him frowning. “Has anyone in this room ever done anything legally?” The long silence that followed disappointed her. She sighed.  
“We need a contract, because if there are problems-”  
“There will not be problems, do you want the house?” The vendor asked. She threw him a scary glance.  
“Ok, do you want our money? Yes? Then you will make me finish my speech.”  
Thiseias huffed. “Do we really need to?”  
“Yes. We. Do. Without a contract, we will live every day of our life with the fear that guards will come and throw us in jail. Whoever is selling will not suffer, because they will just say that they don’t know us and we will have nothing to prove otherwise. I call this 'protection against any incoming threat’.”  
There was a long silence. She added: “It’s either you give us a contract and we give you the money peacefully, or the deal is off and I am calling the guards.”  
The vendor breathed out. “I have to speak with my superior. I will let you know tomorrow.”  
The group left the house in silence. While Azar and Alja kept going, Thiseias pulled Tiriana in a tavern nearby, wanting to talk about what he had just seen.

He brought drinks for the both of them, then confronted immediately Tiriana.  
“What was that?”  
Tiriana frowned. “What?”  
“Tiriana, we do not do contracts. That one was the less sketchy-looking guy. Why didn’t you take the offer?”  
Tiriana straightened her napkin on the table. “Please, think. I know you can do that. You know why I did that.”  
“Yes, I know why you did that, but the paperwork costs and we don’t have the money for that.”  
“Yes, we do.”  
“Where? How?”  
She showed her bag. “Here I have what’s left of my allowance. It’s enough for that house, the rest has to go for furniture and ingredients to start the shop.”  
“And how did you get that? Because you have not been working, I am a 'freelance’, as in I work if they call me. You know, the whole mercenary thing. Is there anything you have been hiding? Because you are on so much for doing stuff legally, but here no one has that amount-”  
“My true name is Tiriana Blackstar.”

Thiseias shut up for a long moment, before laughing loudly. “No, there’s no way you are a Blackstar. Show me the crest and maybe I’ll consider believing that.”  
She sighed, then took off a brooch from the inside of her vest. It was silver, with the enameled centre showing a purple and green pointy shield with a tower.  
“The green represents magic, the purple is royalty. The tower in the middle is the knowledge and the will to learn constantly. Is this proof enough?”  
Thiseias looked at her and at the brooch trying not to lose it, then failed.  
“You are a Blackstar.”  
“Do not shout you numbskull!”  
“This… This is insane, what is a Blackstar doing in this place?”  
Tiriana took a sip of the cider that she had in front of her.  
“I have been sort of half kicked out and half went away on my own accord.”  
“And why is that?”  
“Please don’t laugh. Please don’t judge.”  
He shook his head, then reassured her. She took in a deep breath. “I have lost my magic.”

The ranger looked at her as if she had just told him that donkeys fly. Tiriana had an overly-annoyed look on her face. “See? This is why I didn’t want anyone to know.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first big secret is out, what is the next step?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 3 of my big time project! I hope you've enjoyed the story so far. Here we start seeing a bit of actual action! Feedback is always welcome :D

"So. You lost your magic."  
Tiriana sighed tiredly for the tenth time in a row, once they went back to her room at the inn.  
  
"Yes, I have lost my magic." Thiseias shook again his head incredulously.  
"This is so unnatural. Next thing I will see dragons, creatures that have been extint since the end of the First Era, soar the skies."  
He exhaled, while pacing up and down in front of Tiriana.  
"This is becoming annoying. Either you stop walking and being sarastic or I am destroying your kneecaps."  
"You. Destroying my kneecaps. Please, be realistic. You have the same strength as a sponge."  
"Ha-ha. Very. Funny. Now stop."  
  
The man stopped and sat back in front of her. "I'm sorry, but this whole situation is hilarious. Have you tried to do your thing?"  
The woman pursed her lips, then pointed a finger at the glass, focusing on it, then she exclaimed: "Fireball!"  
Nothing happened, much to Tiriana's dismay. She looked back at Thiseias, who raised his hands in defeat.  
"Wow. Okay, you made your point."  
  
Silence fell again in the room. Tiriana let out a frustrated sigh, starting to feel unwell. Not really physically unwell, but she felt tired, without energy. Thiseias appeared to have felt it too, as he kneeled in front of her.  
"It'll be alright. You just need sleep." He patted her on the shoulder, then pulled out a bag full of food and supplies.  
"You going?" She asked grumpily.  
"Got a job tomorrow, but I'll be back by next moon. I'm leaving some food. Also, good luck with the Notary."  
  
Oh, yes, she needed to go and buy the house - she had found the actual owner and agreed the sum, now she had to go through the bureaucracy for that.  
"It's good that you have a job, but I thought you'd be… More surprised at the revelation?"  
"Oh, I am. Still. I can't really help here. You know. I am a mere rogue. No magic in me."  
She sighed softly, looking disappointed. He shook his head.  
"Look, whatever you want to do, I am going to support you, but you need to help yourself first. Go and set up the apothecary, you need to start somewhere. A rogue can't really be of any help, but I'll put feelers around as soon as I come back. I'll bring you nice herbs."  
She nodded, then looked back at the scrolls she had been given for the apothecary. She was hoping that it would be the least of her problems.  
  
He waved, then took off to get ready for the job. Tiriana just went to bed, then fell into a dreamless sleep.  
  
The next morning she woke up later than usual. There was a letter addressed to her and a message on a piece of parchment. She rolled on the other side, she would deal with that in due time. She still felt without energy, but she still would have had to get out of bed.  
  
"Maybe once I have my own place things will settle and I will be more focused." She said to herself once she finally got down from her bed.  
  
***  
  
Thiseias had gathered Inara, Yaro and other two for his party. They had responded to the announcement. It appeared that the city Judge had lost his precious pet wolfhound in the Whisperers Forest and had requested for a group of brave men willing to risk their lives to reunite him with his beloved at the reasonable price of two thousand Gold coins.  
  
Was Thiseias' group full of brave men? No, but the sound of all those coins surely did the trick and what was the big deal about going into an enchanted forest that had been left untouched ever since the First Era to look for a dog? There had been objections, but they quickly had been silenced by the supposedly consoling presence of an alchemist - closest thing to a mage they could find - and a brand new package of healing potions and salves, that Thiseias had requested to Tiriana some days before the departure.  
  
Had Tiriana been completely onboard with the plan? No, but Thiseias was one stubborn ranger and so were his companions. She had just huffed, gave them the package and told them that she would not go looking for them if they got lost. They joked around that for a moment, then they left.  
  
And now they were ready to go.  
  
Thiseias checked the last few bits - he had unofficially been appointed as chief of this party due to him being the oldest in the group and supposedly the wisest. He nodded slowly, then guided the party outside of the city and towards the forest, a few miles up north east, by the Mountains of the Lamentations.  
  
The road had mostly been silent and free of any danger. There were legends around the Forest, just like around any natural environment in the continent of Meukoras. This one in particular told that a long time ago the forest had been the dwelling of a powerful sorcerer. The sorcerer had been wrongfully killed and while exhaling his last breath he laid a curse that all men with evil intentions would die and become spectres who would always wander without finding peace - hence the name of Whisperers Forest.  
  
Of course there were the sceptics, who did not believe that the legend was anywhere near the truth and were more on the lines of 'it is just the wind from the nearby mountains echoing through the woods', but honestly there were not many. Also there had been some disapparitions of thieves and rogues, so all of this contributed as proof that the legend was in fact true.  
  
By the time the group arrived in front of the forest, the happy mood of the start had sunken. Now they were all staring at its borders with an increasing sense of dread.  
"Thiseias. Are you sure we really have to go?" Asked Inara, taking in a couple of breaths.  
Thiseias looked at him. "Yes."  
"There is no way a wolfhound went straight in there. All animals have better survival instincts."  
"Then why do its tracks go straight in there?"  
"Look man, the whole forest looks creepy enough. Let's find another hound and bring that to Judge prissy-pants ok?"  
"You kids have no sense of adventure. Right, plan B. Let's head back, go to the pets market, bargain for a hound and bring it to the judge."  
He picked up his baggage, ready to go, then felt vines around him. He quickly pushed away Yaro, who was the closest, shouting:  
"RUN, YOU NUMBSKULLS!"  
The group just had the time to see him dragged into the forest, then saw other vines and without thinking twice ran for the hills.  
  
Thiseias woke up in what appeared to be a clearing. He had to have hit his head against something, the last thing he remembered were the vines catching him and dragging him into the forest. Well, now he was sure that no dog would have willingly gone into such a place and that the whole thing was set up. He would discover who did that, but first he would need to survive and get out.  
  
If the legend was true, then his hopes were thinning down every second, if not then he'd better get a move on. He slowly got up, glad that he only head a couple of bruises. He was also grateful that the vines had caught also his backpack, at least he had some advantage.  
"Well, forest. It's me and you."  
  
***  
  
Yaro finally spotted the city of Durinamurum and he could not be more happy. Together with his companions he rushed into the city and back to the inn, where he immediately spotted Tiriana, who was filling out some parchments.  
  
She frowned when she saw Yaro and Inara. "You're back early. You left not even twelve hours ago."  
The two men sat at her table and finally took in some breath. They looked at Tiriana, as if they had tasted death on first hand. She gazed at them.  
"What happened?"  
The two looked at each other, briefly explaining everything. When they got to Thiseias however they fell silent for a long moment. It was then Inara who spoke.  
"Look, about your boyfriend…"  
"By Lumina, he's not my boyfriend!" She exclaimed. Inara frowned. "Then who's your boyfriend?"  
Tiriana's patience was falling short. "I have no one here. What happened to Thiseias?"  
"Wow, for claiming that he's not your boyfriend you sure care a l-"  
She cut him off, snarling, "Where is he?"  
"… In the Whisperers Forest. the legend is true, the sorcerer got him. He's dead meat."  
  
She fell silent at the words 'dead meat'. No, she thought, it's impossible. There is no way he's dead. There is literally no way he's done something so stupid, not even for a lump sum of Gold. She looked away, trying to process what had just happened. Inara gave her a quick pat on her shoulder, then made a sign to Yaro to leave her alone.  
  
She looked at the parchments, then thought about what she needed to do. She needed to sort out priorities and she had never really been good in that. She reasoned with herself. There was no way in hell that the innkeeper would keep her room for however long she was gone, so she needed a place to go back to. She quickly finished to fill the parchments, the moment she had the Act confirming that she had a house, she would then leave to look for Thiseias, hoping that he wasn't dead in the meantime.  
  
She took a deep breath.  
  
A few days later everything was set up. She had managed to track down Inara and to ask him to take her at the forest. He reluctantly did so, but kept telling her during the whole trip that it was useless. When they finally reached the forest, Tiriana looked at it and sighed. Even without her magic she could feel there was something going on, and she did not like it. She thought she also felt something familiar, but she didn't linger on the thought long enough.  
  
Inara was looking at her, trying to get an answer. She felt tears rolling down her cheeks. Thiseias was more likely than not dead. "Let's go back. You're right."  
Inara gave her a sympathetic look, then guided her home. Tiriana was speechless for the whole way back.  
  
She felt sorry for Thiseias, but even more sorry for herself, because she had not has the heart to go through that cursed forest. She felt guilty. She had lost her only friend and that was for her own cowardice.  
  
***  
  
Agnes watched her granddaughter turn away from the forest, defeated. The spell she had used had worked, all she needed to do was now wait until Tiriana came back with a willpower destroyed enough not to attempt and defy her again.  
  
And Agnes Blackstar was as patient as a trap. She would wait as long as needed.


	5. Chapter 5 - What does the fox say?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone unexpected is back and it is time for new secrets to be revealed.

Three months had passed. Tiriana, having decided to move on, had gone through with the paperwork and was now starting to grow her shop. She had started to have a few regulars, who had then spread the word. Also, she did not actually expect to be good at making potions and salves, but she had slowly discovered that she really had a knack for it.

Her mood had shifted and she really was thinking that if she could not have her magic back, she could still do something that she liked. She had made peace with the fact that she would never have her magic back and she had started to feel content with what she had.

This one had been a particularly long day, though.

She sighed, after closing and putting away the last jar. Her apothecary, the Healing Herbs, had been quite successfull and she was due to formally have her own Act to be an independent owner.

The surname Firebell, she had discovered, fit her much better than Blackstar and for two reasons: she did not necessarily have to be tied to family bonds, thus reducing anyone’s chances to have any reason to be disappointed in her, and by anyone she meant her mother’s family. The second reason was that she had no pressure or anxiety to fit the expectations, except the ones she had set up for herself.

There were however two things that really bothered her. She had not been receiving any letter from her dad at all since she opened her shop - she had told him in one of the many unanswered letters and his silence was really concerning. Also, Thiseias’ death really bothered her. She liked making everyone think that she was over it, but all she was doing was lie to herself - and everyone around her. It was true that she had not been knowing him for a long time, still she was mourning.

She thought of the small altar she had made for him in a corner of her house, on the first floor. It had been a spur of the moment. After that, Inara and Yaro had gone to different lands, Sinta and the other ladies had moved out, either finding jobs or going back home.

She felt alone, more than ever. She considered the option of going home briefly, but that felt like it was not an option, especially after starting her shop. The Healing Herbs Shop was going well and there was no reason to close down.

She had also gone through the whole bureaucracy and the pain and the struggle, hell, she had literally consumed every single coin she owned and now the effort was finally paying off. She sighed, finally closing down the door. She went then upstairs and threw herself on the bed.

She woke up suddenly, hearing the noise of some bottles breaking. She grabbed a pan from the kitchen - at least she would have been able to hurt the thief. She slowly went downstairs, then located a shadow.  
“Stay where you are, thief!” She shouted. “I am calling the guards!”  
The shadow slowly turned, raising his hands. “Hey, chill. Just need two things.”  
She stopped for a second. She knew that voice and it took all her efforts to actually utter any word. “… Thiseias?”  
“What?”  
She turned on several candles with a match, then when the room was lighter they both could recognise better each other.  
“Hi Tiriana. I was wondering, got anything for blisters?”  
Tiriana had to use all her willpower not to either smash a vase on his head or cry uncontrollably.

Eventually she failed part of it and started to pathetically sob and cry her eyes out. Thiseias was petrified. He tentatively tried to put his hand on her shoulder to console her, but this made things worse.

In between her tears, she managed to shout: “I thought you were dead, I mourned you, everyone left this place after you disappeared, you moron!” Her voice was cracking and for a long moment she was hyperventilating.

Thiseias still was petrified.

When she finally managed to calm down, she took a deep breath, then went to pick up some water. She then noticed how badly wounded was Thiseias. She composed herself.  
“Have you been to an actual doctor?”  
He was sitting on a chair, waiting. “Why should I go to the doctor when there’s you?”  
She shot him a deathly glance. “You know that I am not a doctor, I am just a poor excuse for an apothecary.”  
“You are also a powerful witch.”  
“A powerful witch without power. Now stay still. At least I am going to try and cover up the nasty scars.”  
“Wow, for some reason I thought you would kick my shins.”  
“It’s still something I can do, moron.”

In the following hour, she managed to soothe and patch up most of the wounds. She sighed. “Now you need to tell me how you got out. I went to look for you. That place reeks evil.”  
“Can we do that tomorrow? I’m tired.”  
She nodded, giving him a cup full of a dense black liquid.  
“What is this?” He asked, slightly disgusted.  
“It’s Draught of Comfort. A painkiller.”  
“And whats inside?”  
“You don’t wanna know. Now drink it, then follow me upstairs. I’ll prepare the couch for you.”  
He complied. She closed the windows and the door, then went upstairs to pull out some pillows and a blanket. He followed her, shortly after.

***

Dear Tiriana,

It’s dad. I hope this letter reaches you safely.

The eagle knows.

Love.  
Dad

When morning came and this letter was delivered, Tiriana felt like she wanted to flip a table. No, Thiseias coming back from the supposedly dead was not enough.

She started pacing back and forth in the room while Thiseias looked at her in confusion.  
“I knew it, I really have made a bad choice leaving!” She was seething in rage. Thiseias, who was still numb from both the pain and the painkillers, weakly spoke.  
“How about you calm down and tell me what happened?”  
“Not before you tell me how you came back.”  
“I will, don’t worry. What happened?”

She handed him the letter. “Here. Look.”  
He briefly skimmed over it, then said: “This is code. What happened?”  
“You are not getting off just because of this, you will tell me how you got out of the forest.”  
“Ok, Sweetcheecks, let’s make a deal. I tell you that, you tell me what happened.”  
“Fine, cool.”

She sat down - she would need more than an infuse of Jade Leaf to calm down. She took in a deep breath, then spoke.  
“The eagle is my grandmother. It’s how my dad and I call her.”  
She made a pause. “She loves having control over people. That is why I need you to tell me how you got out of the forest, because I suspect she’s behind all of this.”  
“C'mon. Its your grandmother. The forest has been evil since the dawn of time.”  
“Not really, but I gather they don’t tell stuff to Nonvoyants.”  
HE frowned. “What do you mean by that”

Tiriana lowered her head. “After the last battle among Mages, the continent’s natural environment changed deeply. Still, to render it evil enough, someone external has to intervene and corrupt it.”  
“And how does anything have to do with you?”  
“I know my grandmother’s powers and she could easily corrupt a forest.”  
Thiseias shook his head. “Still, do you have actual proof?”  
“No, not really. I am worried. This is the first letter I receive from my dad in months, and my dad sends me letters daily. Literally. Look here.”

She showed him a box containing all the letters her dad had been sending her since the day she left.  
“Alright, I understand.” He looked at her. “I don’t think your magic has returned, right?”  
She shook her head.  
“Right, so we make a plan and stick to it.”  
“Yes, but first you need to let me know what happened in the forest, or I am going to annoy you for the rest of your life.”  
He grinned. “You got yourself a deal. You may want to sit down and give me something to drink.”

***

_Thiseias woke up in a clearing, not knowing exactly how he had arrived. He remembered the vines dragging him into the forest, maybe he had hit his head on a rock. He looked around, seeing his backpack near him. He smiled - at least he had not been rendered completely defenseless. He pulled out a short dagger. “Okay forest. It’s me or you.”_

_He ventured inside the woodland, looking for water, then food. If the forest indeed was under the influence of a sorcerer, then he would find them and talk them into letting him out. If the sorcerer was not there, then he just had to find where the forest ended._

_While he was scouting for water, he saw a path, a very old one. He kneeled on the soft ground, touched the soil, felt the moisture. He stopped, feeling something creeping from behind and turned around just in time to see nettles sneaking all around him. He froze. Either this was a bad joke, lor a sign that he had to move before anything actually bad happened. He slowly got up, then fixed his eyes on the nettles: they were circling him like snakes. He let out a breath and slowly backed down, while staying on the path that he had found._

_As predicted the nettles attacked him and he barely got out slicing his way through with the dagger. Once free, he ran away following the path, until he reached a lake. “Finally a change.” He breathed out. The lake wasn’t as big as expected, but enough for a small boat to surf through it. The scenery itself was quite breathtaking, if he didn’t consider that he had been trapped in that. On the good side the nettles were not following him anymore. He took a look at the clear water. He would need provisions and that appeared to be a good spot. He did not trust it though._

_He looked around to find a way to test the waters, but if the whole forest was enchanted, then he would never know exactly. He though about it, then looked at his cape. Did he need it? Yes. It was indeed very useful to test the water. He would buy a new one if he got out, if not dead men don’t need capes._

_He tossed the cape into the water. He waited for a moment and nothing happened. He then pulled out his flask to fill it with water, but when he was about to lower it into the lake, the cape melted in a few seconds. He cursed. He would have to find a new way to find water._


	6. Chapter 6 - Thastus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tiriana finds a master, while Thiseias ties up loose ends at home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back! I know I haven't been updating here, but please bear with me! We are slowly entering in what I would call the first proper arc of the story! Strap your seatbelts :)
> 
> As usual, feedback is always appreciated. More info on https://lostmagicbylhaewiel.tumblr.com

**Chapter six - Thastus**

**Tiriana finds a master, while Thiseias ties up loose ends at home.**

Thiseias and Tiriana together with a caravan full of travellers finally reached Thastus on a cold winter morning. The decision to close the shop and leave had not been easy, but if there was any chance to discover what had happened in the Whisperers Forest exactly there was not much to do. Also, maybe the idea of actually having a proper master was not that bad, now that Tiriana was actually wrapping her head around the thought.

Maybe she really had potential hidden somewhere, although she was very much doubting it. She had overall been concerned mainly for Thiseias, who was returning in his homeland even though he was still technically banished, but he had told her everything would be fine and he had survived so far.

Speaking of survival, she would need to step up, if her suspicions were correct.

The institution of apprenticeship had been abolished in Estria, due to the construction of the Lifnora Academy of the Arcane during the Second Era. Attending the Academy had become more prominent until it had become mandatory for all Mages to attend. This had been done in an attempt to reduce the increasing problems of abuse of power and to give regulations to the Rogues.

This project had backfired. A lot of middle-class Mages had left Estria, looking for masters who could teach them properly, as the Academy would teach only standard-level magic, relying on the families of their pupils for further schooling.

This resulted in creating a gap between the Estrian Mages and those from the other countries. The Blackstar family, being old, still represented the power when it came to magic, but the newest generations were not as powerful as their eldest ones, hence as much as everyone felt dismayed, they had no sympathy or advice to spare for Tiriana, who had lost everything, when she turned to the Academy for advice, before the thought of leaving crossed her mind. Everyone except her father Sol had been mostly pitying her.

Now she had been a good apothecarian in a big city like Durinamurum and she had friends she could count on.

She admitted, when planning the trip to Thastus, on the other side of Meukoras, that she would love actively avoiding entering Estrian borders so that they would not meet any obstacles and Thiseias made the route possible, being a more experienced traveller than her. They had also been avoiding any natural passageway. This lead them on the long way through the Lapan Empire, but they had both finally arrived safely.

The Kingdom of Thastus was a flourishing country on the sea. The people there were mostly fishermen and labourers. The reigning family, the Mitreas, had raised the kingdom from a wasteland of pirates and illegal trades raided by the leftovers of a war and made it into a powerful nation worth of its name. The Merchants had contributed to rebuild cities and harbours: among those the Selans, who at the time owned a small business in textiles, stepped up and rose to be the main provider of textiles, along with all the fame and glory that came with collaborating with the king in rebuilding from scratch the whole society.

There were still pirates and there was still criminality, but everything was kept in check by the king’s guard, the Order of the Oracle, once commaded by the skillful Commander Thiseias Valiadis, discharged for alleged treason, and now commanded by Commander Vasso Xenellis, a man of valour, idealistic and ambitious.

Thiseias sighed, while he was looking around, as they reached the town of Vavishte. “really, nothing has changed at all since last time.” Tiriana could not help but feel a sad undertone in his voice. She asked: “You okay?” The man just nodded, then crossed his arms on the chest, not saying a word more.

She decided to completely change subject. “So, where will we be staying? Any nice inn you’d recommend?” He shook his head “We are not going to any inn.”  
“Are you serious?”  
“We are staying at my mum’s house.”  
“Why do I feel that there is a catch?”  
“Because you are clever. Now listen to me and don’t get angry.”  
“I will get angry regardless.”  
“Yes, I know. Now listen. My mum is very traditional. She will let you stay, but you must pretend to be my girlfriend.”  
She looked at him in confusion. “Are you actually being serious?”  
He nodded.  
“Oh gods, I can’t believe that you are actually being serious. And how are you going to convince me that this is not a stupid plan? Look, I can stay in an inn, you can stay with your mum.”  
“But why do you need to spend for an inn?”  
“And why do you need to come up with such a stupid plan? Can’t we just say that we are friends and stay in separate rooms? Isn’t this smarter? Are you using your brain or are you just being stingy?”  
Thiseias was running out of arguments against that. “I just really want you to be safe? Also, you can’t stay in an inn forever and my mum’s got the comfiest bedrooms.”  
“I would have never thought that I would hear the word ‘comfiest’ coming from you.”  
“We have a cat as well. You told me you miss yours, because you had to leave it with your father right? You can cuddle with the beast from Hell.”  
She sighed. “Alright, alright, you win. I still think this is a stupid idea.”

A few miles later, away from the main city and into an anonymous village, they were knocking at a red door in a nice neighborhood. They heard footsteps, then the door opened. An old woman with a gentle look was gazing at Thiseias. After a long moment of silence she spoke. “Are you still alive?”  
Thiseias went to hug her. “Hi mum. Yes and are you not yet in a care home?” His tone was playful. The old lady smacked him lightly, then turned her eyes on Tiriana. “And who is this girl?”  
Tiriana bowed lightly, smiling. It was Thiseias who spoke. “This is Tiriana Firebell. She’s my girlfriend.”  
That felt awkward. Tiriana breathed, then said: “It’s a pleasure meeting you.”  
Moments later she was sitting at a very crowded table, between Thiseias and his sister Voula. There were other women in the room, whom Thiseias was introducing.

Later, when everyone was finally asleep, Tiriana was sitting on the bed, still struggling to process what had happened. So far she could tell that no one in the family suspected a single thing. She had briefly gathered information, Thiseias and his mother had been mostly translating the language all the time. And now it was night, the man was already lying on the only bed in the room and she was sitting at the farthest corner trying to process everything.

“Are you going to sleep yes or no?” Asked Thiseias. “If it is about sharing the bed, I am not going to come near you.”  
She stared at him. “I know that this feels weird, I am ready to sleep on the floor if it makes you more comfortable.” He added.

“It's… You know…”  
“Well, different mentalities here. I am a man of honour, you have my word that nothing is going to happen. The question is: do you trust me?”  
She sighed. “I am going to trust you. Do I have options? I don’t know, we are in your house.”  
“Why do you always have to think that you don’t have choices? How did your family raise you?”  
“That is a sore thumb. You don’t get to choose once you are on the top.”  
“Now you are not, now you can. What do you choose?”  
She took in a deep breath, trying to figure out what she wanted to do.

Nobody had ever given her any choice about anything, she was always the one who had to bend to others’ decisions. No one had ever given a damn about what she really wanted, hence her life had become a constant and apathic flow of decisions and choices made for her.

And even now that she was gone, that she had started choosing - or was it really choosing, after all she had taken up things like becoming an apothecary because that was the only option - now that she had started, she was still having a hard time figuring out what to do.

This however was not just merely a matter of choices. How much of her personal space was she willing to give up? She was not used. Not even in that inn she had forsaken her intimacy. She was not really used. Even back home it was rare that anyone would show her affection, so she had never developed any feeling for it.

She looked at the bed, Thiseias was already asleep - he had not waited, she guessed this showed how much he felt tired - then stopped overthinking it. Thiseias had given her his word that he would not come near her and she did know him well enough for her to say that he was a man of word. She then laid down on the bed, at the opposite side from the man.

Not long after that she fell asleep.

***

The morning came and she woke up, finding herself in the same exact position she had fallen asleep. The other side of the bed was empty. She slowly got out of bed and got ready.  
She stepped in the main room trying to be unnoticeable and it worked until Thiseias decided to shout: “Oh, you’re finally awake, sleepyhead!”  
She grumbled something at him, then said: “Good morning.”  
Everyone looked at her. Thiseias’ mother, Sotiria, handed her a cup full of what seemed coffee and milk. She nodded, then thanked her. The women made space, so she could sit. Now Tiriana was simply listening to the chattering, absorbed and trying to catch any word she could understand. Thiseias was in a corner, minding his own business.

Surely there was something going on, she caught the name of Thiseias a few times and she suspected they were talking about him coming back, among all other things. She stayed mostly silent, sipping from her cup from time to time.

This until everyone in the room left, except for the mother and the youngest sister, Voula. At this point Thiseias spoke.  
“Now, darling, if you go and get ready we are going to look for your master.”  
Tiriana was confused. He quickly added: “I told them that you have lost your magic.”  
She shot him a glare. “Did you have to, dear?”  
“Well. Do you want to find them? Because we need help.”  
“And-”  
“I have not put foot in this place in years.”  
“You have a point.”  
“Yes, but mum knows someone, and she gave me the name and address. Good news, they will take you in. Bad news, they live in the capital.”

Tiriana had only heard stories about the Golden City of Slivstra. The city was built along the banks of a the great Clarenlin river, which flowed into the Bay of Milto and was truly a lively display of wonders, markets and architectures. Its wonder was matched by the backdrop of the monumental Dragonfly Falls, which helped shape the city to what it was today in ancient times. The skyline was crowded with white houses, that sometimes reached up to two floors in height.

Various cultures left their mark not just on the buildigs, but also upon the city’s identity. What historically was a city of predictability grew into an amalgamation of differences and it was this that united the 15 million people to this day.

The city was an hymn to the Merchants class and their main income came from the textiles - they had all kinds. Tiriana knew that her family usually would have their clothes commissioned in Slivstra, but she herself had never owned one, she’d been told that she would get her bridal dress, but she was now at the point where everyone had lost hope that she would ever find someone, or that her family would in her stead.

Tiriana regardless would have given her eyesight for one of those dresses, metaphorically speaking.

So when she heard the word 'Slivstra’ she got all excited. Thiseias toned down her excitement mentioning the actual reason they were going.

Tiriana calmed down, then added: “Are you sure it is a good idea? I mean, don’t you have troubles coming over there?”  
It was Sotiria wwho spoke. “My son has never been one for subtleties. Also, he is not really guilty, but there is no proof of this.”  
“Yet.” Added Voula, Thiseias’ sister. “One day we will have enough to prove he’s innocent.”

Tiriana simply nodded, not really wanting to dig deeper.


End file.
